Definitions of God (and how our own definitions change)

Everybody has their own definitions about God. Even if your definition is “something imagined by humans that doesn’t really exist”, that’s still a definition. Those who believe in God may have more complex definitions. They have their own ideas about who God is, what he does and how he has acted throughout history.

There are no doubt some people who have never had those definitions challenged. They go their whole lives believing certain things about God and never experience anything that might suggest those beliefs may not be completely accurate. However I would think that these type of people would be few and far between. Most people have had their definitions of God challenged – sometimes on a fairly regular basis. On a minor scale, it might just be a slight disturbance on the faith radar – a minute or two when you wonder whether you definition of God is really right. On a major scale, it could mean a complete overhauling of your entire belief system.

In Christian circles, we hear a lot about doubt. Everyone has doubts occasionally, we are told. But doubt is not good. When a person has doubts, they should just keep believing anyway. Keep pressing on and our doubts will disappear.

I have spoken to many Christians who have had lengthy periods of doubt – what might be called a time in the wilderness. Their definition of God has been challenged so much that they begin to doubt what they know of him. Does he really love me? Does he answer prayers? Am I really saved? I’ve had times like that myself. As someone who constantly questions and challenges, my definitions of God seems to be under constant attack.

When I’m in this position – or when I am talking to someone who has gone through a similar thing – the presumption is made that a person having those kind of doubts wants to have those doubts removed. They want to leave the wilderness and get back to the faith and belief they once used to have. They want God to fit their old definition again.

But what if he can’t? What if God has failed to do the things we once believed he would do? What if the church’s teachings fail to work out in our lives? What if we can’t reconcile the bible with what we know to be true? What if our definition of God just doesn’t match up with reality?

Some people choose to pray and get prayed for until their doubts go away. Others spend years in the wilderness, never seeing an end in sight. Perhaps on the surface they appear to believe all the things they’re meant to believe, but underneath it all they know that their definition of God no longer makes any sense. Others refuse to acknowledge the doubts the continue to have – even to themselves.

Then there are those who simply leave – whether it’s church, religion or even God. If they can’t believe in a God who fits their definition, then they won’t believe in God at all.

Not that long ago, I had my definition of God challenged in a big way. God failed to act in a way I thought he would. God’s love, compassion and control were all question-marks in my mind. The God of my definition no longer seemed to exist.

But just because the God who fit my definitions didn’t exist, doesn’t mean God didn’t exist at all. And just because I was questioning God’s love, compassion and control doesn’t mean that they were no longer there. It’s just that my definition was wrong. I needed a new definition.

I no longer think of God the same way I did when I was a child. Nor do I think of him the same way I did when I was a new Christian. God hasn’t changed. But my way of defining him has. In another ten years, my definition of God may have changed again. I don’t want to go back to my old ways of looking at God. Doubt, in a way, has been good for me. It has moved me onto new ways of looking at God. And I would prefer to do that than simply have my doubts prayed away until God fits my definition again. 

I don’t imagine I will ever get to a perfect definition of God. In a way, God cannot be defined – even though this doesn’t stop us wanting to define him. But that’s okay. For as long as I am prepared to redefine God – instead of expecting God to fit my definition – then I will continue to grow. And maybe my definitions of God will get closer and closer to the truth. 

Moments of Beauty

A young boy trips over and skins his knee. He takes a big breath, fuelling himself for a very long cry, gives his mother a quick glance to make sure she’s watching – and then spots a butterfly. He stares at in wonder, as his pain is forgotten and the opportunity to get attention is missed. He is having a moment of beauty. The mother has her own moment of beauty. On her way to comfort her child, she stops and simply enjoys the look upon her son’s face.

Moments of beauty are like that. You are so caught up in something beautiful that you forget your own worries, your own fears and your own desires. All the thoughts that were fighting with each other inside your head simply disappear. You forget about ‘me’ for a while. You forget about everything. You simply enjoy the beauty.

The best example of a moment of beauty is the mother who looks into her newborn baby’s eyes. Regardless of how many moments of beauty I have in my life, nothing will ever compare to that experience. In fact, I doubt very much whether anyone is ever captivated quite so much as a woman who first looks into her child’s eyes. The pain of labour is completely forgotten. The worries and fears about how she will actually raise her child no longer seem that important. To say you lose yourself is a cliché, but sometimes a cliché best expresses the truth. The new mother really does lose herself. When a mother looks at her newborn, she doesn’t think of who she is or what she wants. There are no thoughts at all, well not in words. Just an overwhelming feeling of love and wonder.

Moments of beauty don’t have to be centred around some amazing experience, like giving birth to a child. They happen all the time. They can be big or small. Sitting on the beach watching the sunset. A flock of birds flying overhead. Looking at a waterfall. Attending a school assembly and hearing children sing. Listening to the solo of a classically trained singer. A moment of silence at the end of a hectic day. Walking into an old church and feeling the impact of awe, magnificence and wonder.

The other day, I was standing outside the shopping centre, when a young couple walked past. I can’t remember what I was thinking about at that moment, but I’m sure I considered it terribly important at the time. But as soon as I saw them, I stopped thinking. Now they were attractive, but I wouldn’t say they were stunning. But there was something about their faces and their body languages that really moved me. There seemed to be an ease there that you very rarely find. They looked at each other as if they really understood the value of the other person. Not stunning, no. But definitely beautiful, even if it’s not the kind of beauty that can be captured in photographs.

I have been calling them moments of beauty, but I most often think of them as moments that touch the soul. Because that’s what I think they are. When something captivates you with its beauty, I believe it’s felt more with the soul, than with the body. They are the times when our spirit finally gets our flesh to shut up for a moment. And it’s when our flesh is quiet, that I think God is mostly likely to tap us on the shoulder and remind us that he’s still there.

There is a passage in the bible that always makes me think of moments of beauty. It is found in 1 King 19:11-12.

Then He said, “Go out, and stand on the mountain before the LORD.” And behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind tore into the mountains and broke the rocks in pieces before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire; and after the fire a still small voice. 

I’m not quite sure why it makes me think of beauty, because there is certainly nothing in there that is beautiful. I think it’s that still small voice at the end. When we do have a moment of beauty, or a moment that touches the soul, we can sometimes hear that still small voice. It’s like God’s gently whispering in our ear. But we have to pay attention or we miss it. And most of the time, we’re not paying attention.

Whether we’re paying attention or not, I think moments of beauty are God’s way of reminding us that this life and this flesh are not all that matters. When we ignore our flesh, we can begin to pay attention to our spirit. When we lose ourselves, we may just end up finding God.

Selling God

When mainline churches are declining in numbers, Pentecostal and Evangelical churches seem to be growing big-time. Many of them have congregations that number in the thousands. Those that belong to these churches would probably claim that it’s all to do with the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit brings them to church and works powerfully in their lives once they get there. People want to go to spirit-filled churches.

There’s probably an element of truth in this. But I think there’s a much bigger reason for the growth in these type of churches. Pentecostal/Evangelical churches know how to sell Jesus.

From the minute you walk through the door of the church, you are treated as a potential customer. You’ll probably be greeted by a friendly face at the door, who will ask whether you’re just visiting. Say you’re not a Christian, but you’re thinking of going to church, and you’ll be bumped up to VIP status. Make a commitment to Christ and you get your own welcome pack – introduction booklet and free bible. Now I’m not criticising this. New members and visitors should be given warm welcomes. And Pentecostal and Evangelical Christians aren’t the only ones who do this. But it is a selling point.

Another selling point is the music. Forget boring organ music and hymns. That’s now the kind of music that will sell a church. For Pentecostals, it’s all about upbeat and loud music and lyrics that are easy to remember and easy to sing along to. This music is supplied by a band, that sits up on stage, so that you can watch them as though you’ve come along to a free live music event. For many churches, you’ll also find that the music itself can be bought on CD, so you can even listen along to the songs at home.

The social aspect also helps to sell the church. I think this is more of an issue for young people – and by young people, I mean anyone under 55. People want to be around people of their own generation. The Pentecostal/Evangelical style churches, with their music and their feel, attract younger church-goers. Then with bible studies and other fellowship groups, there are lots of opportunities to socialise. It’s part of the whole fun package.

Now I don’t have any problems with any of these things. I think they are good things to do and that all churches should be doing them. It makes sense that if churches want to attract people, they have to make church attractive. But I am concerned about how far churches go in selling the church – at the expense of other, more important things. And I definitely have issues in seeing Jesus as a commodity or product to be sold.

Let’s take the message. One strong message that comes across in the evangelical churches is that God wants to make your life better. He will bless you. He will heal you. He will get you that job, answer your prayers, give you what you want. The preacher speaks of how he had absolutely nothing going for him, but God completely turned his life around. Some sermons sound like 30 minute advertisements for God. I’ve seen TV advertorials with less hyperbole. From a selling point of view, it makes sense to focus on this message. The way you sell anything is by drawing attention to the benefits. But Jesus shouldn’t be reduced to some kind of religious product that will solve your problems and change your life. That’s not what Jesus is about.

Jesus did a pretty terrible job of selling himself. He said things that made people uncomfortable. He got on the wrong side of the religious leaders. He asked people to do things that seemed practically impossible to do. He said that people had to be servants. He asked rich people to give up all their money. He told his followers that they would be persecuted because of him. None of the early Christians would have followed Jesus because he was the best religious product on the market at the time. They followed Jesus because, although they knew it would make their life harder, Jesus was someone worth following.

I wonder about today’s new generation of Christians. Are they following Jesus because he is someone worth following? Or are they following Jesus because someone did a good job of selling him to them? And if it’s the latter, what happens if the product fails to deliver? What if God doesn’t bless them, heal them, get them that job, turn their life around? Do they ring up God and ask for a refund? Or do they simply go searching for a better religious product?

Churches should be attractive places. When people go to church, they should get some benefits. But Jesus should never be reduced to a good religious product. He is so much more than that.